Manhattan Divorce Attorney Richard Roman Shum Explains What Can Be Used Against a Spouse in a New York Divorce
NEW YORK, NY – Individuals facing a contested divorce in New York often worry about what their spouse may use against them, from text messages and social media posts to financial records and fault-based allegations. Manhattan divorce attorney Richard Roman Shum of the Law Office of Richard Roman Shum, Esq. (https://www.romanshum.com/blog/what-can-be-used-against-you-in-a-new-york-divorce/) has published guidance explaining how these issues can affect property division, support, custody, and the grounds for divorce. The discussion addresses fault grounds, financial misconduct, digital evidence, parenting behavior, and the defenses that may apply in a contested matter.
According to Manhattan divorce attorney Richard Roman Shum, New York has allowed no-fault divorce since 2010 based on the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for at least six months, but the state’s fault-based grounds remain available. “Many people assume that filing on no-fault grounds protects them from every allegation, but a spouse can still raise fault-based conduct when it bears on finances, safety, or parenting,” Shum explains. In a contested case, the conduct behind an allegation often matters most when it affects economic and custody issues.
Manhattan divorce attorney Richard Roman Shum notes that under New York Domestic Relations Law Section 170, there are seven grounds for divorce, four of which are fault-based: cruel and inhuman treatment, abandonment for one or more years, imprisonment for three or more consecutive years after the marriage, and adultery. Even when one spouse files on no-fault grounds, the other spouse may file a counterclaim using a fault ground. The distinction matters because fault rarely comes into play in an uncontested divorce, while in a contested case before a New York County Supreme Court judge, such allegations may become part of disputes over economic and custody matters.
On the question of property division, Shum points out that New York courts divide marital property through equitable distribution under Domestic Relations Law Section 236-B, which means fair but not necessarily equal. Ordinary marital fault, such as adultery by itself, typically has little effect on property division unless it connects to financial misconduct, safety, or another relevant statutory factor. Egregious conduct, including wasteful dissipation of marital property, or transfers made without fair consideration, can influence the outcome.
Financial conduct during the marriage can become a major issue in contested proceedings. Shum explains that dissipation occurs when one spouse uses marital assets for purposes unrelated to the marriage, such as gambling away significant sums, spending on an extramarital relationship, or making secret transfers to family members. “When a court finds that one spouse wasted or hid marital assets, it can adjust the equitable distribution calculation, and the spouse responsible may receive a smaller share of the remaining estate,” he says. In contested matters involving financial issues, both parties are generally required to exchange and file sworn Statements of Net Worth, and failing to disclose assets can lead to adverse inferences, discovery penalties, or post-judgment relief.
Attorney Shum emphasizes that a parent’s conduct is directly relevant when children are involved, because New York courts decide custody based on the best interests of the child. Factors that may weigh against a parent include domestic violence, substance abuse, interference with the other parent’s relationship, a recent criminal record, and untreated conditions that affect parenting ability. “Custody decisions are based on the best interests of the child, not on punishing a parent,” Shum observes. “Adultery alone rarely affects custody unless it directly affected the children, while domestic violence and interference carry far more weight.”
Shum also highlights the growing role of digital evidence in contested cases. Text messages, emails, and social media posts may be admissible when they are relevant, properly authenticated, and not obtained through illegal means such as hacking. Social media activity may be used to contradict claims of financial hardship, disprove custody claims, or establish a timeline of behavior, and even deleted posts may be recoverable through discovery. The firm advises clients to treat written communications during a divorce as potential evidence.
Not every allegation will support a fault-based claim. Shum notes that Domestic Relations Law Section 171 provides several defenses to adultery claims, including connivance, condonation, recrimination, and a five-year discovery limit, while Section 210 generally bars actions on a ground that arose more than five years before filing, with statutory exceptions. A successful defense may defeat a specific fault ground, though the divorce may still proceed on another available ground, including the no-fault ground.
To help protect their position, the firm advises individuals to avoid common mistakes such as moving out of the marital home without a plan, signing documents without legal review, destroying records, oversharing on social media, and unilaterally moving marital funds. The distinction between contested and uncontested divorce affects how much of this evidence matters, since disputed finances, parenting issues, and fault allegations play a far larger role in contested cases.
For those facing a contested divorce in New York and concerned about what a spouse may claim, contacting an experienced matrimonial attorney early may help in making informed decisions before avoidable mistakes affect the outcome.
About Law Office of Richard Roman Shum, Esq.:
The Law Office of Richard Roman Shum, Esq. is a Manhattan-based firm focused on divorce, matrimonial, and family law matters, including child custody, child support, property division, and spousal support. Led by attorney Richard Roman Shum, the firm serves clients throughout Manhattan and the surrounding boroughs of New York City, handling both contested and uncontested cases. The office is located at 20 Clinton St FRNT 5D, New York, NY 10002. For consultations, call (646) 259-3416.
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